Being pregnant opens the door for other parents to give you advice. Some you should listen to, and some you should ignore. Here’s some advice that wasn’t my cup of tea.
Announcement Season
If you’re drafting a holiday pregnancy announcement status update, pause for just a moment before you tell the world.
The Mother of All Crying Fits
It was just another stop for gas on the way home. 90 minutes later we finally got back on the road, after I went a little crazy, thanks to some evolutionary Mom Programming.
“Me Time”
I never minded being the parent with the full-time gig… but now that I’m back to work full time, I’m bitter about the discrepancy in “Me Time” between us.
The Bra Lady Gives Advice
Before tossing out random advice to people you don’t know, consider the fact that not everyone can conceive babies in a heartbeat. A little sensitivity goes a long way.
Night Terrors
Fewer than 1% of adults experience night terrors. Now that I’m a parent, one of my worst fears becomes real for a few seconds every night.
For the Birds
All summer long, I looked forward to my maternity leave. Now that it’s over, I’ve decided that this working mother stuff is for the birds.
Milk Cow
Breastfeeding isn’t as easy as some bitches make it look. Kidding aside, it is harder than it seems, and feelings toward it can be complicated.
She’s Let Herself Go
We’ve all seen them: new mothers who look like crap in public. I pitied them, thinking they should really take more time for themselves. What the hell was I thinking?