I was about 18 weeks along when a coworker asked me an off-hand question: “So, have lots of people been groping your belly?”
My face lit up, and I took three quick steps toward her. “No, they haven’t! Do you want to?” I even stuck my belly out a little by way of invitation.
Since I first got pregnant, I’d been warned about the belly-grabbers. “Don’t be afraid to tell them to ‘F’ right off!” people would tell me. “Don’t let anyone touch you without your permission,” they’d warn.
But I never really understood, pre-pregnancy, why I would be angry at people touching my belly. I couldn’t wait to have a pregnant belly! And I was pretty sure I’d want everybody to touch it!
However, given the number of women who warned me how much I’d hate it, I figured that it was one of those things that would only come with time. I assumed that like giant milk boobs, this was something that would only occur when my pregnancy got going in earnest.
Fast forward to now: I’m almost 21 weeks pregnant, and finally looking like I’m actually pregnant. But I still can’t conjure up an ounce of irritation or even negativity toward belly-grabbers. I’m not a close talker, or a Grabby Grant-type, but I am a fan of snuggles and affection. Hugs, even from strangers (for the right reasons), are pretty awesome in my book.
Here’s the poetic justice in this situation: nobody seems to want to touch my belly! I’m just itching for people to rub my bump like it’s a lucky troll or a Buddha statue, but there are no takers. Hell, even my husband has to be told when to touch my belly, because he wouldn’t likely do it on his own.
I must be putting off a “don’t touch my belly” vibe. Any idea how to fix that?
I just wanted to say how grateful I am you shared your story. I have been looking for a blog to read and just loved your honesty! It’s so nice to know you are not alone in the infertility world! I am truly happy for you and your husband!
My husband and I have been trying for two years! We have had five failed attempts with clomid and three failed IUI’s. We are doing IVF on my next cycle and I am terrified. We just picked up all meds. It was very frightening!
Your blog helped me laugh at all the crappy emotions that I have felt these past two years. Thank u for sharing your most personal feelings!